Memory Share: pnwsalex

[11calls]

You know Richard is pissed at you. Hell, you’ve known he was going to be pissed off at you since you first brought the non refundable ticket to Istanbul, Turkey. There was a reason that you didn’t tell him about it until after you’d come back. It’s probably the longest time that you’ve ever not contacted him, but the last thing that you wanted was for him to end up flying to Turkey as well. After all, if Simon had wanted Richard to come, he would have mentioned him, but the invitation (plea?) was for you alone and not for the both of you. You hadn’t even told Nic about it until you’d already had the ticket purchased and the room rented on the company card. Honestly you think that this is the closest that Nic has ever come to murdering you (which is saying a lot after your twenty year friendship and the stuff you pulled last year) but that doesn’t really matter now because you’ve touched the Horn. You’ve seen it and you’ve touched it and you know in your gut that you were supposed to do both.

So now you’re here talking about it by carefully not making talking about it. There are things you want to ask but you know how hard it is to get in a word edgewise when Richard Strand is on a lecture streak. But he is still going on about the mixing of religions and Pythagoras and how different borrow and steal and change things over time. It’s not what you’d expected when you’d had this meeting on the calendar after all of this. You’re still exhausted, jet lagged really and you haven’t slept well in two years. Why should this be any different as you pick up your coffee so you don’t yawn?

Richard’s giving you a bit of a blank look, and you know that his response has more to do with how much you’re exhausted and slightly distant. It’s there in the teeth of it, and you’re bracing for another fight about what you’ve done. “”If you’re not happy with my response, I don’t know what else to provide in terms of rational-”

You cut him off, because you both know that’s not what you meant. “No, it’s not that. I’m happy, I mean with your response. It’s just… what does any of that have to do with... you know… you?”

“I was under the impression that’s what all of this is about. Your show, your podcast, it’s about the Black Tapes… But it’s also about us.”

For a moment you blink, there’s lines that the two of you don’t cross, that you haven’t crossed and that you definitely shouldn’t cross. Still, you can’t help but to ask Richard “What do you mean ‘us?’” Because you’re really quite sure that he doesn’t mean it in that way.

“Well, it’s definitely about me. But I listened to your show recently, all of it.” Had he listened when you were in Turkey? Was it because he missed you? “And at some point, it became about you. You are at the centre of this with me, yes?”

You don’t think you want to be at the center of this. You’re just supposed to be the one telling the story of Richard Strand and his black tapes. But you also know that Richard isn’t wrong as you softly say: “Yes…” You have been at the center of this since the first time you couldn’t sleep after the cabin, the time you found Maddie Franks, the time that Frank Barnes reached out to you from Three Rivers

Richard’s voice is pleading. “Whatever happens, you have to know: you can trust me.”

Do you?? Yes, but you feel the need to say, if only for the recorder that’s still running on Richard’s reclaimed dining room table. “Oh, that’s not an issue between us.”

“Alex, it’s obvious from what Coralee revealed that I’m being followed and there have been instances where you seem to have too, so… we have to watch over each other. We’ll figure this out, but only if there’s a trust between us. That has to be our starting point now or there’s no moving forward.”

“Okay.” You say it quickly, what else can you do? You’re the one who had broken his trust with this before.

“Okay.” He says it with finality, as if something is settled, and in some ways it really does feel like it is.

Comments

Video - un: detwatts

[gadaboutdetective]

[Ah, acting first and asking forgiveness later... He knows decisions like that well. He focused on the latter half of the memory though, brows raised curiously.]

It’s good to have someone you can put your trust in, even after all that.

[11calls]

I mean I do trust him with my life even if afterwards I told my show that I didn’t know if I did or not.

[gadaboutdetective]

Trust isn’t something that’s easily granted... [He certainly hadn’t trusted as easily as he used to thanks to recent years, it was something he was working on now.] Is there a reason you told your audience that?

[11calls]

He's the subject of my show, I'm not supposed to trust him implicitly. I'm supposed to question everything and all that goes along with it. But I mean... I did trust him. Even me talking about it on the show where I didn't kind of sounds like bullshit, at least to my ears.

[gadaboutdetective]

I think... that there are some people that you can’t help but trust, even when it might be smarter to not? [Sometime that always surprised him,] Even when instincts or the situation make caution seem smarter?

[11calls]

I mean, that's definitely true considering everything. And I mean there was a reason why I called him eleven times in the first place.

/Looks at my last tag... sees obvious autocorrect typo... oof.

[gadaboutdetective]

Exactly, some part of you knew... Or at least thought it was worth the risk. Mm... That and you’re very persistent, from what I’ve seen of you.

stupid auto correct.

[11calls]

He calls me 'annoyingly persistent' you know. As a form of endearment. Just like I call him an asshole sometimes for the same reasons.

But yes, Richard Strand is always worth the risk and effort to me, honestly.

[gadaboutdetective]

[Don’t mind Llewellyn as his brows raise a little at both of those ‘terms of endearment,’ he’s only just gotten used to the idea of using them and... He offered a clumsy, curious smile.]

Clearly expressing endearment has changed since my time, hm? I suppose uh— as long as you know what the other means by it...?

Voice: Ben.Solo

[havethestrength]

That sounds complicated.

[11calls]

[That makes Alex laugh, because she’s used it so many times to describe things herself. ]

Oh believe me, it is. It’s complicated as hell.

[havethestrength]

Do you need to talk about it?

Sorry I missed this!

[11calls]

It's okay. I mean, it's not really something that we can fix until we're back home unfortunately. Thank you though. Unless you want to hear my story so you know it like I know yours.

[havethestrength]

Only if you want to share it.

Private Audio

[11calls]

The problem is that it's not just my story you know? It's Richard's. And Simon's too.

Re: Private Audio

[havethestrength]

[Neither was his.]

you don't have to talk about it.

[11calls]

Let me talk to them about it. It might be a moot point considering you know all the memories and stuff that have been shared.

Re: Private Audio Un: Thestrandinstitute

[nobasisinfact]

It wasn't the worst memory to be leaked.

[11calls]

Far from it.

[Then, teasingly: ]

Sorry it didn’t give you any more fodder for teasing me.

[nobasisinfact]

Who said it didn't?

[11calls]

It didn't?

[Alex tilts her head confusedly.]

What could it have that you'd tease me for?

[nobasisinfact]

You expect me to tell you?

[11calls]

Well obviously, otherwise how else are you going to tease me?

[nobasisinfact]

Yet, you still ask.

[11calls]

I like to be prepared!