Accidental video: Fuckingfabulous

[flammablepitch]

[Baz is in his dorm, sitting on the edge of the magicked oversized bed he shares with Simon and sitting across from a rather hostile elf. The emotion that is exuding from the recording is annoyance.]

Look you little fucker. You're forcing me into a very dry December right now, so if one of us should have the hatchet, it's me. Crowley, you didn't even burn when I set you on fire, so you've no right to be cross about shit. Seriously, what the fuck in wrong with this place. Fucking voyeuristic Sphere. Not enough that you get to watch us all the time, now you have to go and make tangible evidence that you're doing it?

[Baz's hand can be seen holding his wand as he points it at the elf.]

You know what, 'Come on baby, light my fire'.

[Fire shoots from the wand and engulfs the elf, hatchet and all. Nothing is actually happening, but there's a sense a small, frustrated satisfaction.]

Comments

audio; un: snow

[fuckingtragedy]

Baz, when that thing kills us in our sleep, I'm blaming you.

Re: audio; un: snow

[flammablepitch]

This went out to everyone, didn't it?

[fuckingtragedy]

It has, and need I remind you of your flammability? As much as I adore your pyromaniacal tendencies...

[flammablepitch]

I'm not setting the dorm on fire, just the elf.

[fuckingtragedy]

And yet it's still fire.

[flammablepitch]

I like fire.

cw for naughty bits

[fuckingtragedy]

We've talked about this. But now I'm sounding matronly.

[switched to private]

And you've only yourself to blame for the dry spell. I'll shag you while he watches. I don't mind. Set the fucking thing on fire while I'm on your knob.

Re: cw for naughty bits

[flammablepitch]

Honestly, I don't know if I could get it up with that thing watching. Besides, what if were were in the middle of things and it popped up in the sheets or something?

[fuckingtragedy]

Do you think it would do that?

[flammablepitch]

Probably. It's a fucking pervert.

[fuckingtragedy]

Is it? How do you know?

[flammablepitch]

It keeps watching me in the bathroom.

[fuckingtragedy]

So do cats.

[flammablepitch]

They're fucking perverts, too.

[fuckingtragedy]

[Simon laughs.]

At least you're consistent.

[flammablepitch]

You expected me not to be?

[fuckingtragedy]

Don't cats get away with murder? No one would fault you being inconsistent when cats are involved.

[flammablepitch]

The inconsistency is that I like cats. I hate this fucking elf.

[fuckingtragedy]

You like cats?

[flammablepitch]

Yeah.

[fuckingtragedy]

Did you ever have one?

[flammablepitch]

Nah, dad thought it was too normal-like.

[fuckingtragedy]

So. Hold on a moment. Let's review.

If you had a cat, it would both make you happy and bother the hell out of your dad?

Sounds like a win all around.

[flammablepitch]

My family's not bad, Snow.

[fuckingtragedy]

Oh, yeah. They're lovely. Very accepting of our relationship and of you being a vampire.

...Sorry, I didn't mean that. I know they're not bad. Just...

Bad joke.

[flammablepitch]

They are, Snow. They love me even though I'm a monster. They could have, should have killed me. Instead, they made sure the forest was stocked so I didn't starve and treat me like I'm a normal mage.

You just never got to know them.

[fuckingtragedy]

I didn't. I don't guess they'd want me to get to know them though, unless there's some other reason I wasn't invited to family dinners after we started seeing each other. Not that I'd blame you for it. I'm messy. Why would you want to bring that around your family?

But you're right. Sorry for implying your family is less than perfect.

[flammablepitch]

The Mage was trying to destroy everything they'd ever known. They needed time. Eventually, they would have loved you as much as I do.

[fuckingtragedy]

[Simon scoffs a little.] Sure. Like one of their own.

I don't want to talk about this anymore right now. Later.

[flammablepitch]

[Baz lets out a heavy sigh.]

Simon.

[fuckingtragedy]

Not here.

[flammablepitch]

I'm coming back to the room, then.

[fuckingtragedy]

Whatever you think is best.

[Simon's just curled up on the couch under as many blankets as he could find. Good luck getting him out of there.]

>> action

[flammablepitch]

[Screw getting him out. Baz is just going to wrap himself around him.]

[fuckingtragedy]

[...well, that will work. Simon sighs, and takes a few moments to carefully roll over -- ever mindful of his wings -- to tug Baz onto the couch and under the blankets with him.]

I was being a prick, Baz.

Video: Rey

[unpawnish]

It's not satisfying for very long, you know.

Re: Video: Rey

[flammablepitch]

No, but it's at least something.

Re: Video: Rey

[unpawnish]

I hate these things so much.

Re: Video: Rey

[flammablepitch]

Agreed.

Re: Video: Rey

[unpawnish]

What do we do about them?! They don’t even stay sealed in things they should be!

audio; un: SOLDIER1

[wutaiwarhero]

Perhaps the tradition behind this doll are lost on someone who isn't from Earth, but why is everyone so frightened because it moves? If anything, it's irritating.

audio

[flammablepitch]

I'm not scared, just annoyed. I don't like things watching me; especially when I'm trying to make out with my boyfriend.

Other people, shit's not supposed to move like that in most worlds.

audio

[wutaiwarhero]

Unless these devices can be removed, something is always watching you, and most likely recording the data.

Dolls don't move on their own on Gaia, either. It's just not a brand of horror I've ever found frightening.

Re: audio

[flammablepitch]

Oh, I'm aware. It's the fact that it's tangible that's annoying.

Re: audio

[wutaiwarhero]

You'd rather forget your lack of privacy?

Re: audio

[flammablepitch]

Yes.

audio

[wutaiwarhero]

Well, I hope ignoring the situation makes it go away.

Re: audio

[flammablepitch]

It won't, but there's not much else you can do. It's that, abstinence, or putting on a damn good show for the pervert robot keeping us here.

audio

[wutaiwarhero]

Well, I hope whichever rebellion you choose works out for you.